Heartedgigi's Journals

Dear Miss Eliza. I miss you so much.

You may shcoked about this but yes I MISS YOU.

cause; I loved to see you on buzz with new events of you.

Now I'm just looking @ old pics . And it is not funny!

What are you doing nowadays ; I can't fallow cause you locked everything about you.

WHERE IS MY STRONG IDOL?!?

Pleasee see this and COME BACK for me

Gigi

How well do you know me?

1 What was my nickname growing up?

Gigi

Holy

Miranda

Rihanna

2 At a party, what would I definitely be doing?

Cry

Drunk

Record people

Striptrize

3 What am I scared of?

Dinasour

Building Machines with big additions

Spiders

Sex

4 Who would I most like to meet?

My ex bf

Britney Spears and Paris Hilton

Katherine Moenning and T.A.T.U.

My old school teacher.

(Answer will be given tomorrow!)

Hey there

I am back.
How are the things there?
:)
I missed you all a lot!
I am now @ my official facebook.
wanna add?
just ask.
Anyways
Uploaded some pics for you.
xoxoxoxox

p.s.: I became crowded character in my inside whenever i've said i am ALONE
and now i became Inc.
My names are ;
Cadela,Mystery,Gigi Nailah Heart,Pandora..
;)

Blog time

Today I watched him a lot. OMG. I know ; We fighted .... And I am tooooooooooo angry to him. But thats true ; I will never change.I need a real love.but he always make me confusing about it.But i dont care them-for talk shit about us- ...I only care about him. dont know why I watched him when he played basketball...It was funny... When he jumped I was laughing..When he made points I shoted...When he smiled I was ready to scream when his shirt touched his muscles ( omg I feel so bitchy lol) I was ready to be crazy!!!OMG... I dont know... thats why I sat front of the window and watched him all day.I didnt care about wtf my friends gossips,I just sat down and watched him...He looked at me finally...( It means that he could see me first time I sat down..Cause he knew that I was there... for watching him...,He also knows that how much i want him..He is sure.thats why he made plans about me so crazy!!!)When he looked at me I was ready to fall from window ahahah...I feel stupid.Yeah maybe I wanted another one yesterday...But today when I watched him i felt really different.But it wasnt love.It was deeper and complicated than a love.Thats why I said I dont now.I want to meet him on my little holiday.( the next 11 day)... Maybe on wednesday maybe tomorrow.I didnt talk about it with him yet.( When i feel strong and ready to talk i will ask this to him - i hope - )I feel angry.Cause it was his fault before...He want deeper...I want love and now i am sure thats why we broke up ( agen) It also happened last year( in different way with same person) I dont know wtf he is feeling.He is not angry with me.He is still talking with me.but I want to talk to him face to face...It is not only working on phone& enthernet etc...(Like my friend said.)I hate it when I feel complicated..( It generally----akways--- happens to me) ... But i dont know today I feel different ....I feel in love ( This word kills him I know...So forget this word) And strong ( cause I could look at him after all)...I am not afraid anymore...This is the important subject about him : my parents also know that ; when they talk about him they see it makes me smile...It makes me laugh,It makes me happy.This is the important reason for that I wanna meet with him asap.I have plant of time to write,so I am countuine...Here is a storm ready kill us.The weather looks sunny but It is ready to kill us with a hard wind...It is windy...It is complicated like my feelings...People can not look well ( they make their eyes small and run around) I just walked...I didnt care.I was thinking when I walked to my home.The house is empty now And i will be alone till 7p.m...I am hungry.I am decide to write a story about me.cause I wanna do that.I am still reading Pandora( Yeah cause I have got no time to read) except two days, I am ready to finish it. I have a time to read it.when I watched him today I was also reading Pandora.This is could be a reason to feel strong about it; Pandora makes me stronger.I feel so close myself to Pandora.We have lots of commons.And I like it.I adore her style,her thoughts,her loves and especially her God; Isis...She feels strong .. It makes me strong,too..( I feel stupid.) ... I am succesful about shitting.I draw a picture calling like "hands"... No we havent got any lessons about drawing... A boy said I need your help please draw it for me... Thats why I draw it...And i relaxed when i did it... Uhm...I feel guilty,cause I didnt draw a picture,I didnt draw something when computer came to my home.I opened my doors today...Computer gets my whole life! huh! freaky..I must stop myself...So i am making plans now....I wont give my whole hours to school and enthernet all the time.I will read,I will go shopping,do some activities.Or i am going to decay here.-.- I am listenning music..And i feel so good today...I am at home.What can i do now??.hmmm dont know .. Maybe I can start to my book and after that countuine to read Pandora and tidy up my room with music and do something...Actually I must prepare myself for ask this question " can we meet one of day about next week??" to him...I dont know what a hell he will answer.It will probably " I dont know" cause when i opened this subject yesterday; he said same one.And my friend said ; Dont know means " no " in different way..I was angry!!! No I wont let myself go down today..I feel energitic I must be....I dont think he will say no.Cause he is a little bit rude person ; He can answer however he wants...So he could say " no, of course.I will be busy"... or something like that.In other way ; he could say this,too" of course we will..-.-" It is all about my behavings.Cause he also feels complicated bcoz of me.Cause I was cold to him in 2 day...I feel sorry... That i will tell him today.Dont know what will happen..Hope things will go better.I met with lots of people,I met with my old friends agen.I missed all of them...It is good cause I was really happy to find them... Anyways..I feel strong..This is the whole subject... (= Have a nice day my friend... xo Gigi

Yeah

I said I AM GIGI NAILAH HEART,just whenever you want

But it wasnt for that you use me!!

It was for a friendly message :

I am always here for you to talk,for have fun,share problems,for chat.

So dont be rude when you talk to me OK!!!???!!!

Gigi Nailah Heart

I feel

COMPLICATED WE USED TO LOVE OURSELVES.. my mirrors left me. I feel shit bcoz of you.. No that one wasnt for you.that one was for the man. I was hopeful agen. Gah.I will stfu.: Here are my feelings.. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I am sorry Things didnt go OK And I see these are all my problems. I have got some problems!! I am sad,I am hurt Nobody see that you are killing me. And now I know there is no happy ending for us It kills me It kills me... When you look at and say "go deeper" I am praying and i dont know why; No one live for you,no one coming to save you I am playing with you now. In the dark....First i thought i loved it. after things didnt go same. And it scares me It start to kills me. I am all empty now I am still in love. And you will never see You will never remember my name when i left home without you. Things can stay with you Smell , kissing , love.... I have got no feeling I dont want things will decay with me I dont need ; things will lost in me.. ( you can use them with other girl) I am nothing I must come back to myself asap. I will STFU I wont talk agen There is no magic to feel about it There is no word to say to you back. There is nothing to see everything is in your mind , babe. And i cant fallow anymore I feel disgusted I feel sad And thats all bcoz of you These are the last thing about us This is the last dance for us We will leave we will done. Curtains closed.The game is OVER. Nobody sees what the fuck is going on You make me stop you dont want me to tell this shit to people. Why ?? Why dont you talk to me now? You wont stop me I am waiting Lets see whats happen for the next Easily we can see we have got nothing to talk about it. We all feel dead we all surprised We all gone to hell Just get off if you dont care Just leave me if you wont see Just break if you are not loving me As i know that you are killed me. Like today..Like yesterday And i am tired..I am finished. It is time to say goodbye This is the last letter this is the last dance There is no happy ending for us.. xo Gigi

Life is Hard.

And it gets harder every minute. I must learn to live by myself. I must lean my lesson for today My mom decide to work . So she is searching jobs. My dad is angry to my sister. She is being lazy I feel myself so bitchy In this mouth.. Dont really know... whats wrong with me. What the fuck happen to me . I am not afraif to something I feel guilty.. I feel so complicated. I hate September .. always bad things happen in it. Always make me shit. Today i saw him.. I feel so .... dont know....too complicated. We are talking; but i know somethings wrong. Cause things are going really well. It is not normal ( for me ) Hope it wont kill me soon. xo Gigi p.s.: No one live for you.

Hai..Hai..I feel 30 today

I dont know I feel 30. I feel .... hmm 30 year old no-makeup model woman. Is that a good feelin?? O.o Oh i think yeaah caÄ±se yesterday i was feeling 96 O.O so.. ahah It is good. I am getting younger every day passes LoL ... talk to me. I am bored.

If i were know it..

I wouldnt like you .. I wouldnt look at you... I wouldnt smile at you.. I wouldnt walk to you. Hug you..... Kiss you... Let me know you Let me love me forever.. I am sorry babe...I am just allergic to love i am lovexia... It hurts more than anorexia. If i were know that you were my end... If i were know you were the heaven I wanted to give you my heartt. I wanted to love you.. But you are not the end.. You will live to the end.. I dont wanna loved by you... You are such a perfect butterfly for me which is having beautiful wings. Love Hurts. I dont wanna be hurt anymore xo

bublegum toxx star said Hello

How is goin? Hope everything is well, hum.. I am fine,danke ^.^ everythin is fine School is goin okay I wont go to the school tomorrow hahahaha I feel stronger, I am watchin DVDs a lot. Any suggestions?? I am really really okay...belive me ;) =P xo Gigi currently mood: hungry..